Why The Right Can't Stand Liberals
And it's not because of policy......
This past weekend, I had the chance to watch my little brother get married at a beautiful location in Central Oregon. The wedding was just about perfect. Food. Venue. Ceremony. Speeches. The whole nine. I even gave the best man speech and didn’t screw it up, which admittedly felt pretty good. Some of you who are reading this right now were right there at the wedding and I got the chance to talk to you. Your compliments on the blog, and the mere fact that you read it mean the world to me, so thank you.
Weddings can often be a clash of cultures. Not a clash in the sense of a fight, but literally just two worlds colliding. People from different parts of the country, with different ways of life, and yes….different political views. I abide by the “no politics at a wedding” rule, but it’s interesting being a fly on the wall for some of these conversations. Small towns were meeting big cities. Liberals were meeting conservatives.
I don’t think I’ve shared this on the blog before, but I am not a registered part of a political party. Don’t worry, I’m not looking for credit for this or to prove that “no one tells me what to do!” I literally just don’t register for a party because I don’t love the tribalism or labels that are associated with it. I like being able to agree and disagree with policies from both sides. I tend to vote Democrat, but like having the option to vote as I see fit on a given policy or for/against a given candidate. Generally speaking, I’m moderate with a lean to the left.
In my opinion, most socially “liberal” policies tend to be centered around basic human compassion. Women can decide what to do with their bodies, people can marry whoever they want, kids should be able to go to school and not get shot, etc. I’m probably a little more fiscally conservative and believe in free markets (hello 30-something white male who lives in Manhattan!), but also see the need for a “social safety net” that provides for the most vulnerable parts of our population. I’m talking about single moms and people with illnesses, not the guy who thinks “Capitalism has failed me” because his podcast with 50 listeners isn’t paying him handsomely.
On the whole, if you strip away all of the rhetoric and “talking headism”, I do not think that most people hate liberal policies. I think people hate liberals and what liberalism sometimes stands for. If you listen to most liberal politicians speak, they are pretty level headed. They don’t actually want to flood the country with undocumented immigrants, move over to a communist system, or force your kid to change genders in the third grade. They also don’t talk down to people in small towns who tend to lean right. Well, except Hillary. That “deplorables” comment back in 2016 may have lost her the midwest, and in turn, the election. I bet if you asked her today she’d give anything to take those words back.
The policy stuff is all smoke and mirrors. The real reason people on the right hate liberals is because of the perception that they are holier than thou or think they are better than you. And the thing is, this stuff comes more from people you meet at parties or work than from actual liberal politicians. When I visit Oregon from NYC, I am very conscious of not coming off as a big city douchebag. Seriously, is there any more obnoxious verbiage than “Well yea that’s cool, but actually in (insert big city here), we do it this way.” “Cool man, can you shut the fuck up and let me drink my beer now?”
It’s prevalent throughout the left leaning landscape. We’re more educated! We’re cosmopolitan! Your small town is a shithole! Ha! You go hunting and fishing?! We eat at Michelin restaurants! You go to church? Religion is brainwash! The list goes on. I basically enjoy all of the activities associated with cities. I also know that no one else cares or is required to enjoy the same lifestyle that I do. Here’s a hot take: Everyone should live where they want to and do what they want to. Additionally, they should not be concerned if someone else doesn’t share those same priorities or desires in life. In short, mind your own god damn business.
I met a family at the wedding who lives in rural Idaho. I don’t want to live in rural Idaho, and they sure as hell don’t want to live in Manhattan. I don’t want to hunt or fish, and they don’t give two shits about trying the new Spanish Tapas place that just opened in SoHo. Carry on.
It’s a shame, because the majority of liberals do not talk this way. The issue is, the ones who do are the ones who stand out. The democratic party has a branding problem. They’ve become the party of Hollywood, Ivory Towers, and Obnoxious Intellectuals. The every man or every woman shares nothing in common with these identities.
Here’s an idea: Next time you run into someone (at a wedding or elsewhere) who’s from a different background than you, ask them a question. Maybe don’t lead with “Oh, so do you eat your fancy meals out at Chilis?” or “Oh, do you want your kids to leave the state so they can go to a good university?” How about a good old fashioned “What do you like to do for fun in ________?” Pass the salmon. Let’s listen to the best man speech. I heard the guy giving it lives in a big city on the east coast. I hope he’s not one of those holier than thou liberal assholes.
Perfect!